You never know when your time is going to be up. We often ask ourselves WHY? Why did this happen to such a wonderful person? Why did God take him from this Earth? Why God? Why?
Many of us have lost loved ones while we have been on this Earth. Whether its family, friends, or even just someone you've heard of. We have all been through this battle at one time or an other.
This afternoon my stepmother's dad passed away. He was outside working on a truck, when the jack that was holding the truck gave way and fell on him and killed him. We do not know whe this happened or even how long he was out there. At this point in time Im not even sure who found him. From what I know he hasn't even been moved yet, because they have to do the investigation. They did call an ambulance and tried to revive him, but they did not have any luck getting him back. David was such an AWESOME man who always came over battles. I can still remember the time he asked me "Is Brett treating you right" Id always respond yes David he is! He would reply "Well good because if he isn't, Im gonna kick his a$$!" When Audree was born he called to see how life was going. I responded as usual "Its AMAZING" Once again he asked me if brett was treating me good? I replied yes David he is the best husband and daddy ever. His reply?? "Well good because if he isn't, Im gonna kick his a$$!"
My stepmom lost her mother 10-11 years ago due to brain cancer. This was a very hard point in my life because her mother always treated me like I was always a part of that family. Even though I wasn't blood, I was considered a grandchild. I ♥ Todranny so much and losing her was a very hard thing to deal with. I even wrote her a long letter and placed in her casket on the day of her funeral. I even had a dream before I had Audree.... She came to visit me and tell me things. In a way I feel it was her way of telling me Apryle Im here and Im watching over you and that baby.
My stepmom almost 40 and now she does not have a mother nor a father. I do not have the words nor the emotions to express how I feel for her. You know we have had our ups and downs but no matter what, she has always been there for me. She is like a sister to me, the one I can come to and tell all my problems to and she always had good adivce for me. She has been there for me and never let me down when I needed her the most. Not only that but she is so good to Audree and always eager to help me when needed. I can't imagine what she is going through right now and I can't even imagine the thoughts that are running through her head. He lives in Teague, which is about a hr to a hour and a half away so they are now having to drive up there and see her father. I just pray that she is okay and can handle what she is about to experiance. He is all she had left.
At a time like this it really makes you treasure what you have in your life. It makes you stop and think about everything that has ever happened and how lucky you are to still be on this Earth today, as this very moment. It makes you not want to mad at anybody, take everything youve ever said to someone in a time of anger back, and most of all just look at the loved ones you have around you and embrace them.
Only God knows when our time is up. Only he knows when he is going to take us from this world and let us come to Heaven to be with him. Never take a day for granted.... Cherish each and every moment you have.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 – “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.”
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Weekend Fun
Our weekend was so much fun!! We spent it with just us.................... our little happy family!
Yesterday morning miss priss decided she was going to wake us up at the crack of dawn!! It was 6:00 AM when she started stirring! We laid in bed half awake half asleep, then all the sudden Audree starts talking to us through the monitor! It's pretty amusing to hear her talking, she doesn't wake up crying! I got up, fed her the bottle, and she laid back down til around 7:30. We all got ready and went and had a family breakfast at our FAVORITE place Lolitas! Oh... I just ♥ their burritos and salsa! After breakfast we went to HEB and did grocery shopping!
We went to church last night and we were all decked out in our UT apparel, even Audree had her's on! Everyone at church got a big kick out it and said we were the cutest little family. After church we came home and got ready for the UT game... HOOK EM HORNS!! UT kicked UTEP (University of Texas El Paso) butt! I had to shut Audree's door because daddy like to get really loud when UT plays!!
Today daddy let mommy sleep in until 10:30!! YES I SLEPT THAT LATE! I was so shocked! I mean since Audree has been born, I haven't really slept in that much, but it was much needed sleep! We got ready and went to lunch at Don Carlos! We have heard good things about it so we decided we were gonna try it! Their salsa is alright, it could be hotter! We also tried their cheese dip, but i wouldn't recommend it. It didn't have very much flavor! I got their chicken fajita nachos and they were pretty darn good!! Brett got some combo platter and it was a TON of food! They brought it out to him in sections! HAHA Audree was being a little fussy girl because she was so tired but was fighting her sleep! She finally conked out while sitting straight up in my lap! She is such a little toot! NOW we are home and getting ready for the COWBOYS to play! After we get little miss in bed; we are going to watch a movie.... What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas!!
Most of you know that Brett and I have been dealing with some issues regarding his family. We have decided that we are better than this as people and are going to be the bigger people regarding certain situations. During church Saturday we were talking about Heros and what is means to be one not only from a Biblical stance but also from a personal stance and how others view us. Brett & I discussed things when we got home and I decided you know what this isn't how I want to live my life. I dont want to walk around with hatred in me, I dont want to belittle someone or certain people who do mean something to my husband. It hurts him when things like that are said and when he is hurt I am hurt. I have forgiven, but not forgotten and that is okay. I have a right to be upset, and hurt but I will not let it affect how I live my life. My husband & dughter mean more than life itself to me!! They are what matters most and that is where all of my attention is going to be focused.
This weekend has been one of the best weekends for my husband and I. We have reconnected in ways I thought would never happen! We have spent every moment with each other and I got butterflies in my tummy several times this weekend! It is such a wonderful feeling to be with the man you love with all of your heart and soul. I know things have changed for the better and we are going to continue to be our happy little family that we have created!
Tomorrow I am off work and get to stay at home with Audree! YAY!! Just mommy & daughter time and I can't wait! I think we will go shopping for a Halloween costume and loko at some SPOOKY decorations! Its Audree's FIRST Halloween and she is going to be the cutest little baby out there!!
Yesterday morning miss priss decided she was going to wake us up at the crack of dawn!! It was 6:00 AM when she started stirring! We laid in bed half awake half asleep, then all the sudden Audree starts talking to us through the monitor! It's pretty amusing to hear her talking, she doesn't wake up crying! I got up, fed her the bottle, and she laid back down til around 7:30. We all got ready and went and had a family breakfast at our FAVORITE place Lolitas! Oh... I just ♥ their burritos and salsa! After breakfast we went to HEB and did grocery shopping!
We went to church last night and we were all decked out in our UT apparel, even Audree had her's on! Everyone at church got a big kick out it and said we were the cutest little family. After church we came home and got ready for the UT game... HOOK EM HORNS!! UT kicked UTEP (University of Texas El Paso) butt! I had to shut Audree's door because daddy like to get really loud when UT plays!!
Today daddy let mommy sleep in until 10:30!! YES I SLEPT THAT LATE! I was so shocked! I mean since Audree has been born, I haven't really slept in that much, but it was much needed sleep! We got ready and went to lunch at Don Carlos! We have heard good things about it so we decided we were gonna try it! Their salsa is alright, it could be hotter! We also tried their cheese dip, but i wouldn't recommend it. It didn't have very much flavor! I got their chicken fajita nachos and they were pretty darn good!! Brett got some combo platter and it was a TON of food! They brought it out to him in sections! HAHA Audree was being a little fussy girl because she was so tired but was fighting her sleep! She finally conked out while sitting straight up in my lap! She is such a little toot! NOW we are home and getting ready for the COWBOYS to play! After we get little miss in bed; we are going to watch a movie.... What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas!!
Most of you know that Brett and I have been dealing with some issues regarding his family. We have decided that we are better than this as people and are going to be the bigger people regarding certain situations. During church Saturday we were talking about Heros and what is means to be one not only from a Biblical stance but also from a personal stance and how others view us. Brett & I discussed things when we got home and I decided you know what this isn't how I want to live my life. I dont want to walk around with hatred in me, I dont want to belittle someone or certain people who do mean something to my husband. It hurts him when things like that are said and when he is hurt I am hurt. I have forgiven, but not forgotten and that is okay. I have a right to be upset, and hurt but I will not let it affect how I live my life. My husband & dughter mean more than life itself to me!! They are what matters most and that is where all of my attention is going to be focused.
This weekend has been one of the best weekends for my husband and I. We have reconnected in ways I thought would never happen! We have spent every moment with each other and I got butterflies in my tummy several times this weekend! It is such a wonderful feeling to be with the man you love with all of your heart and soul. I know things have changed for the better and we are going to continue to be our happy little family that we have created!
Tomorrow I am off work and get to stay at home with Audree! YAY!! Just mommy & daughter time and I can't wait! I think we will go shopping for a Halloween costume and loko at some SPOOKY decorations! Its Audree's FIRST Halloween and she is going to be the cutest little baby out there!!
PEAS!!!
Well we FINALLY finished up the orange food group color for Audree and we are now onto the GREENS! This morning we tried PEAS! The smell of the peas was HORRIBLE and ugh the texture was so thick! As I was mixing it up I was gagging!! HAHA I normally have a STRONG nose and nothing grosses it out, but not this time! I put Audree in her highchair and prepared myself for the first bite to come shooting out of her mouth..... BUT she surprised me and liked them! She was saying the num num num like she did with the sweet tators! I was so shocked! We finished up her Peas and then she had her apple prune juice! I think Audree is going to have her daddy's taste buds and like anything and everything that is put in front of her face!!
***IF LOOKS COULD KILL***
***YAY FOR PEAS***
***IF LOOKS COULD KILL***
***YAY FOR PEAS***
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Rubber Ducky You're The One...
Well we tried about Audree's new rubber ducky bathtub!! I was a little scared at first because its for BIG girls, but I was ready to make the change! I put her in the tub and she started kicking her little feet 90 miles a hr! It was so dang cute!!
After her bath, we did our normal bedtime routine! I laid her on the floor so I could put some things away and I looked over at her and guess what I saw: MY DAUGHTER TRYING TO EAT HER TOES!! HA it was so funny. This has become her new obsession! Even tonight when I was trying to feed her cereal she was sticking them in her mouth between bites. I think she was showing off for Grandpa James though!!
After her bath, we did our normal bedtime routine! I laid her on the floor so I could put some things away and I looked over at her and guess what I saw: MY DAUGHTER TRYING TO EAT HER TOES!! HA it was so funny. This has become her new obsession! Even tonight when I was trying to feed her cereal she was sticking them in her mouth between bites. I think she was showing off for Grandpa James though!!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Prayers
Okay so a while back my mom was diagnosed with some pretty severe illness', one which is supposed to leave her basically crippled. Before I got married, I thought my mom would be in a wheelchair and that was 3.5 years ago. She is ALWAYS proving people wrong, and fighting with everything she has. But now Im getting to a point where Im thinking how much longer can she do this?
When I got pregnant with Audree my whole life was flooded with every different emotion a person can have. Not only was I thrilled to death to be having a wonderful blessing from God, but I was also scared that my mom would not live to see her grow. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 primary bilary cirrohsis of the liver. My mom doesn't even DRINK!!! They said at this point in time she will eventually need a liver transplant. I got down, she got down, BUT she has once again fought through that!
As the weeks and months go by she continues to go down hill. Last Friday we were shopping at Kohls, and she as hurting so bad. In fact, it got SO bad my stepdad had to take her to ER. They ran a lot of tests and did cat scans, etc. The results came back..her spleen is englarged and this is what is causing most of the pain. Usually in a case like this, they would remove your spleen and you would go on your way. HOWEVER, my mother isn't an ANY health to go under and have another organ removed. So they are having to discuss other options at this point in time. THe scan also showed that she has some fluid around her heart, her liver is getting worse, she has several masses on it, but they do NOT know what they are, the blood supply in her liver is being cut off, she has some fibroid tumors on her ovaries, etc. I mean the list just goes on and on and on and on. My mother is not old by any means!! SHE IS ONLY IN HER LATE 40's!
Last night I laid in bed saying my prayers and had a breakdown. I haven't had too many breakdowns about my mother, because well in my mind she is SUPER MOM who can do anything and everything. BUT.... reality is starting to hit me. Im scared that at 23 I will not have a mother around much longer. Im scared that my hero, will be gone. Im scared of how would I live without my mom. Im scared that my daughter will never know the woman who taught me everything I know. I seriously do not know how i would go on with my life without my mother. We talk everyday SEVERAL times a day! Even when we argue, we can't stand mad at each other for long. I got out of bed last night and called my mom because I couldn't sleep until I spoke to her. My stepdad answered and I cried my eyes out to him. I just kept saying I dont want God to take my mommy from me. I need her, I need her, I need her. After he calmed be down, I wanted my mom. She got on the phone and I cried to her. BUT once she started talking to me, I felt like everything was okay. She told me she was strong, she is going to fight like hell through this, and she isn't going anywhere. Thats what I needed to hear, I needed to hear my mom say I CAN DO THIS, I CAN WIN THIS BATTLE! After we hung up, I went into Audree's room, picked her up from her crib and cried with her in my arms. I never ever knew how much a mother's love could have on a child. I now know FIRST hand what it means.
My mother is such a role model to me. She raised my brother and I without the help of anyone else. (well my dad was there, but they were divorced). She was ALWAYS by our side and ALWAYS encouraged us to do the things we wanted to do. She NEVER once missed one of my cheerleading competitions and games! In fact, when I did pee wee cheer she was even the head coach for our team. I know when I was a teenager I gave my mom a run for her money, but overall I turned out to be a DAMN good daughter.
My mom is my strength, my rock, my best friend. We tell each other everything and I feel like she knows me better than anyone else in this world. All I can do it to continue to pray to God, and ask him to please get my mom through this. Nobody is ready for her to go anywhere.
All I ask of you is to please keep my mom in your prayers.
When I got pregnant with Audree my whole life was flooded with every different emotion a person can have. Not only was I thrilled to death to be having a wonderful blessing from God, but I was also scared that my mom would not live to see her grow. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 primary bilary cirrohsis of the liver. My mom doesn't even DRINK!!! They said at this point in time she will eventually need a liver transplant. I got down, she got down, BUT she has once again fought through that!
As the weeks and months go by she continues to go down hill. Last Friday we were shopping at Kohls, and she as hurting so bad. In fact, it got SO bad my stepdad had to take her to ER. They ran a lot of tests and did cat scans, etc. The results came back..her spleen is englarged and this is what is causing most of the pain. Usually in a case like this, they would remove your spleen and you would go on your way. HOWEVER, my mother isn't an ANY health to go under and have another organ removed. So they are having to discuss other options at this point in time. THe scan also showed that she has some fluid around her heart, her liver is getting worse, she has several masses on it, but they do NOT know what they are, the blood supply in her liver is being cut off, she has some fibroid tumors on her ovaries, etc. I mean the list just goes on and on and on and on. My mother is not old by any means!! SHE IS ONLY IN HER LATE 40's!
Last night I laid in bed saying my prayers and had a breakdown. I haven't had too many breakdowns about my mother, because well in my mind she is SUPER MOM who can do anything and everything. BUT.... reality is starting to hit me. Im scared that at 23 I will not have a mother around much longer. Im scared that my hero, will be gone. Im scared of how would I live without my mom. Im scared that my daughter will never know the woman who taught me everything I know. I seriously do not know how i would go on with my life without my mother. We talk everyday SEVERAL times a day! Even when we argue, we can't stand mad at each other for long. I got out of bed last night and called my mom because I couldn't sleep until I spoke to her. My stepdad answered and I cried my eyes out to him. I just kept saying I dont want God to take my mommy from me. I need her, I need her, I need her. After he calmed be down, I wanted my mom. She got on the phone and I cried to her. BUT once she started talking to me, I felt like everything was okay. She told me she was strong, she is going to fight like hell through this, and she isn't going anywhere. Thats what I needed to hear, I needed to hear my mom say I CAN DO THIS, I CAN WIN THIS BATTLE! After we hung up, I went into Audree's room, picked her up from her crib and cried with her in my arms. I never ever knew how much a mother's love could have on a child. I now know FIRST hand what it means.
My mother is such a role model to me. She raised my brother and I without the help of anyone else. (well my dad was there, but they were divorced). She was ALWAYS by our side and ALWAYS encouraged us to do the things we wanted to do. She NEVER once missed one of my cheerleading competitions and games! In fact, when I did pee wee cheer she was even the head coach for our team. I know when I was a teenager I gave my mom a run for her money, but overall I turned out to be a DAMN good daughter.
My mom is my strength, my rock, my best friend. We tell each other everything and I feel like she knows me better than anyone else in this world. All I can do it to continue to pray to God, and ask him to please get my mom through this. Nobody is ready for her to go anywhere.
All I ask of you is to please keep my mom in your prayers.
Audree ♥ 's Sweet Tators!!
So most of you know Audree has been trying NEW foods every week! We are still on the veggie kick and we are still in the orange food color. Monday night we got to try SWEET TATORS! When I opened the container a little bit got in my mouth and ICK it tasted nasty! I was like there is no way Audree will like this!!
I made her the bowl and got her apple prune juice ready!! She LOVED her sweet potatoes!! After every bite she was saying num num num and smacking her lips!! It was so stinking cute! I think she is going to have her daddy's taste buds and like everything!! Mommy is the one who is the picky eater!!
On another note I would love to thank all of my friends who love me!! Ya'll are just so awesome... Always there by my side and supporting me in whatever I do and whatever decisions I make!! What would I do without yall??
I made her the bowl and got her apple prune juice ready!! She LOVED her sweet potatoes!! After every bite she was saying num num num and smacking her lips!! It was so stinking cute! I think she is going to have her daddy's taste buds and like everything!! Mommy is the one who is the picky eater!!
On another note I would love to thank all of my friends who love me!! Ya'll are just so awesome... Always there by my side and supporting me in whatever I do and whatever decisions I make!! What would I do without yall??
Monday, September 1, 2008
Labor Day Fun
Well yesterday we spent ALL day with our best friends and Audree's Godparents Zach & Tiff. Zach grilled out fajitas for us while we all swam in their pool. It was so fun spending time with our best friends!! We haven't had too much time to spend with them since Audree was born, but we are making changes on that!! They are the sweetest people ever and they treat Audree SO WELL!!!
Audree has only been swimming one time before yesterday and that was in her little pool. She didn't really care for the little pool, so I was NERVOUS to see how she would react in a BIG pool. Brett and I went to Academy and bought her a little floaty to sit in and some sunblock. We got to Uncle Zach and Aunt Tiff's house and we were ready to go. I put Audree's feet in the water and she seemed like she was okay. I got in and Brett handed Audree to me..... HOLY MOLY I bet the whole block heard Audree screaming!! HAHA She DID NOT like the water. I MADE her stay in the water because I wanted her to get used to it. Needless to say that never happened! I put her in her float and just let her sit on top of it and gave her the passy and sunglasses. She liked it for just a bit, but she never got fully used to being in the pool. After we ate, we all got back in and I thought maybe Audree will do better if daddy holds her, WRONGO!!! I finally got her to sleep on one of the floats and she slept for about 15 minutes, but as soon as she woke up... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! It was pretty funny, but we did make her stay in there with us, as there were NO tears coming from her eyes!!
After we swam, Audree went down for a nap and we all just hung out and talked. Well Zach was at a football draft so it was just me, brett, aud and tiff for a while. When Zach got home we watched some movie called Invasion... IT WAS FREAKY!!! After that movie, they watched Hardknocks which is something over the Cowboys, THEN WE GOT TO WATCH BB10 AFTER DARK!! That is HILARIOUS!!! We came on home around 12:30ish and we were pooped! Audree didn't even wake up when i picked her up and put her in her carseat!! Swimming, well i mean crying, must have worn her out!! She didn't even flinch when i put her in her crib!! She slept all the way until 7:30 this morning!! We may have to take her swimming more often! haha
Anyways I hope all of yall have a great and safe LABOR DAY!!!
Audree has only been swimming one time before yesterday and that was in her little pool. She didn't really care for the little pool, so I was NERVOUS to see how she would react in a BIG pool. Brett and I went to Academy and bought her a little floaty to sit in and some sunblock. We got to Uncle Zach and Aunt Tiff's house and we were ready to go. I put Audree's feet in the water and she seemed like she was okay. I got in and Brett handed Audree to me..... HOLY MOLY I bet the whole block heard Audree screaming!! HAHA She DID NOT like the water. I MADE her stay in the water because I wanted her to get used to it. Needless to say that never happened! I put her in her float and just let her sit on top of it and gave her the passy and sunglasses. She liked it for just a bit, but she never got fully used to being in the pool. After we ate, we all got back in and I thought maybe Audree will do better if daddy holds her, WRONGO!!! I finally got her to sleep on one of the floats and she slept for about 15 minutes, but as soon as she woke up... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! It was pretty funny, but we did make her stay in there with us, as there were NO tears coming from her eyes!!
After we swam, Audree went down for a nap and we all just hung out and talked. Well Zach was at a football draft so it was just me, brett, aud and tiff for a while. When Zach got home we watched some movie called Invasion... IT WAS FREAKY!!! After that movie, they watched Hardknocks which is something over the Cowboys, THEN WE GOT TO WATCH BB10 AFTER DARK!! That is HILARIOUS!!! We came on home around 12:30ish and we were pooped! Audree didn't even wake up when i picked her up and put her in her carseat!! Swimming, well i mean crying, must have worn her out!! She didn't even flinch when i put her in her crib!! She slept all the way until 7:30 this morning!! We may have to take her swimming more often! haha
Anyways I hope all of yall have a great and safe LABOR DAY!!!
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